-
Recent Posts
- (no title)
- HEY ALL! Got a friend whose kid needs a drum kit. Anyone want to lose one?
- TFW you realize that the reason you can’t really vibe on Jack White’s playing is that his approach constantly reminds you of Neil Hagarty (Royal Trux) from like 30 years ago.
- 24 years married and she hain’t shot me in my sleep. Callin’ it a good ‘un
- (no title)
Recent Comments
Archives
- September 2022
- August 2022
- July 2022
- June 2022
- May 2021
- June 2020
- May 2020
- April 2020
- March 2020
- February 2020
- January 2020
- December 2019
- November 2019
- October 2019
- September 2019
- August 2019
- July 2019
- June 2019
- May 2019
- April 2019
- March 2019
- February 2019
- January 2019
- December 2018
- November 2018
- October 2018
- September 2018
- August 2018
- July 2018
- June 2018
- May 2018
- April 2018
- March 2018
- February 2018
- January 2018
- December 2017
- November 2017
- October 2017
- September 2017
- August 2017
- July 2017
- June 2017
- May 2017
- April 2017
- March 2017
- February 2017
- January 2017
- December 2016
- November 2016
- October 2016
- September 2016
- August 2016
- July 2016
- June 2016
- May 2016
- April 2016
- March 2016
- February 2016
- January 2016
- December 2015
- November 2015
- October 2015
- September 2015
- August 2015
- July 2015
- June 2015
- May 2015
- April 2015
- March 2015
- February 2015
- January 2015
- December 2014
- November 2014
- October 2014
- September 2014
- August 2014
- July 2014
- June 2014
- May 2014
- March 2014
- February 2014
- January 2014
- December 2013
- November 2013
- October 2013
- September 2013
- August 2013
Categories
Meta
Monthly Archives: November 2014
Hour 26: Taun Taun innards now kind of clammy and meh.
from Facebook via IFTTT
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
November 26, 2014 at 11:56PM
@psnh ESR for Barnstead, hartshorn rd & parade hill rd? — Ellis Emefty (@lsmft23) November 27, 2014 via Twitter http://ift.tt/1cl2vQ3 November 26, 2014 at 11:56PM
Hour 7: have running low on books to burn. Wife next, but may need to use Aeqo like a Taun Taun if #PSNH doesn’t get the juice back on soon.
from Facebook via IFTTT
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
I was going to write a satirical piece on how people become congressmen, but I remembered someone else did it better. “Did I ever tell you about the man who taught his asshole to talk? His whole abdomen would move up and down you dig farting out the words. It was unlike anything I ever heard. This ass talk had sort of a gut frequency. It hit you right down there like you gotta go. You know when the old colon gives you the elbow and it feels sorta cold inside, and you know all you have to do is turn loose? Well this talking hit you right down there, a bubbly, thick stagnant sound, a sound you could smell. This man worked for a carnival you dig, and to start with it was like a novelty ventriliquist act. Real funny, too, at first. He had a number he called “The Better ‘Ole” that was a scream, I tell you. I forget most of it but it was clever. Like, “Oh I say, are you still down there, old thing?” “Nah I had to go relieve myself.” After a while the ass start talking on its own. He would go in without anything prepared and his ass would ad-lib and toss the gags back at him every time. Then it developed sort of teeth-like little raspy in-curving hooks and started eating. He thought this was cute at first and built an act around it, but the asshole would eat its way through his pants and start talking on the street, shouting out it wanted equal rights. It would get drunk, too, and have crying jags nobody loved it and it wanted to be kissed same as any other mouth. Finally it talked all the time day and night, you could hear him for blocks screaming at it to shut up, and beating it with his fist, and sticking candles up it, but nothing did any good and the asshole said to him: “It’s you who will shut up in the end. Not me. Because we dont need you around here any more. I can talk and eat and shit.” After that he began waking up in the morning with a transparent jelly like a tadpole’s tail all over his mouth. This jelly was what the scientists call un-D.T., Undifferentiated Tissue, which can grow into any kind of flesh on the human body. He would tear it off his mouth and the pieces would stick to his hands like burning gasoline jelly and grow there, grow anywhere on him a glob of it fell. So finally his mouth sealed over, and the whole head would have have amputated spontaneous — (did you know there is a condition occurs in parts of Africa and only among Negroes where the little toe amputates spontaneously?) — except for the eyes you dig. Thats one thing the asshole couldn’t do was see. It needed the eyes. But nerve connections were blocked and infiltrated and atrophied so the brain couldn’t give orders any more. It was trapped in the skull, sealed off. For a while you could see the silent, helpless suffering of the brain behind the eyes, then finally the brain must have died, because the eyes went out, and there was no more feeling in them than a crab’s eyes on the end of a stalk.” –except from Naked Lunch, William S. Burroughs
from Facebook via IFTTT
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
Dinner: BLT Dessert: Ritter Sport Espresso Chocolate with bacon.
from Facebook via IFTTT
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
I had this conversation in a dream last night: Voice on phone: “Hi, this is Furdlblodget Greeblybumpits” Me: “Who?” Voice: “Furdlblodget Greeblybumpits” Me: “What is you username in the system?” Voice: “FDGK5598” Me: “OH! right on. I’m fixing your crap as we speak. Please use your real User ID in the future.” Voice : “but Furdlblodget Greeblybumpits is my name.” Me: “Human beings have names. End users have user IDs. You want a name, come work here and earn it.” Voice: “Earn my name? How do I do that?” Me: “Bring me the tears of a thousand users.”
from Facebook via IFTTT
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment
Tagged! #tbt Tim on a three-cat night, With Miro, Bones, and Fitzgerald
via Facebook http://ift.tt/14RKDQV
DA SOUP! DA SOUP! DA SOUP! DA BREAD! Many goods!
from Facebook via IFTTT
Posted in Uncategorized
Leave a comment